Mindset and Marketing for Coaches and Creators đ Offer Creation đŁď¸ Messaging đ Marketing đ§ Mindset and Productivity
Why You Lose Momentum and How to Get it BackWhen we look at our goals, most people measure progress against how much farther they have to go. In some cases that lights a fire under their ass to keep going. In others, it adds something unwanted. doubt Thoughts of⌠Will I ever get there?â Focusing on the gigantic chasm in front of you produces unproductive emotions and states of mind. Youâre looking in the wrong direction. Many have turned to spirituality in an attempt to circumvent excessive action, deliberate focus, and a less hustle-focused approach to achieving their goals. For some that has translated to making action wrong. And obsession⌠Forget about it. I had my own bout with this.
The truth was I was just scared as shit to fail. And the feel-good chemicals that came from meditation, exercise, fasting, and all the things associated with the woke individual where too tempting to trade for the discomfort of consistent and persistent action. Even if you didnât fall into the spirituality fly trap, you likely fall into these tendencies more often than youâd like toâŚ
The problem isnât a problem of skill or knowledge. Itâs a problem of perspective and persistence. And allowing unconscious tendencies that operate in the shadows to run the show. In this article, Iâm going to unpack why we often focus on the wrong side of growth and progress, how that affects your drive and momentum, and a trifecta of simple practices to start stacking wins and measure progress in the right direction. Why do we focus on negativity by default? Humans focus on the negative because of something called negativity bias. This can be defined as: This bias toward the negative leads you to pay much more attention to the bad things that happen, making them seem much more important than they really are.1 âRick Hanson says this beautifully⌠Our brains are like Velcro for the bad and Teflon for the good. Mix that biological tendency with trained behavior and you have a recipe for focusing on⌠Not knowing enough So, when you set big goals itâs completely natural to look at how far you have to go. To look at the gap in front of you as a problem that needs to be fixed or solved. In a lot of ways, it becomes the enemy. And on the other side of this seemingly vast and endless space, thereâs something we want. Or more accurately⌠What we want because of how we think weâre going to feel when we get there. Now, looking forward to something is very different than using the distance between you and your goal as a place of judgment and unrealistic expectations. More often than not, looking at the long path ahead creates more feelings of stress, anxiety, and frustration than it does feelings of motivation and excitement. Just because itâs our biology doesnât make it bad. Itâs part of our evolution to move in the opposite direction. We have to overcome the default to the negative. Whatâs required is a shift in perspective and practice. You can learn about how you approach goals by looking laterallyThereâs a saying⌠The way you do anything is the way you do everything. Youâve likely seen this to be true. âAll behavior is addictive. All behavior seeks more of itself.â2 This works for us and against us. After working with countless coaches to grow their business, those who focus on the lack of, how far they have to go, what they donât like, their insecurities⌠Are focused on the gap. They tend to have the most excuses. They often feel defeated and as if itâs ânot workingâ even when they do see tangible results. They are overly focused on what they donât have, how far they have left to go, and whatâs missing or undesirable. In every case, these coaches get slower results than the ones whoâŚ
Itâs also very common for people to think they are doing one thing when they are doing something else altogether. You can see this by looking laterally. If youâre constantly focused on the things you donât like about yourâŚ
Then youâre most likely doing the same thing in your business. Unknowingly. But if you were to get in touch with how you actually felt about where you are, you may see that youâre angry or upset by your lack of swift progress. And thatâs okay. But hereâs the thing⌠Those emotions produce drag. They slow down growth. Until attribution happens. You must acknowledge how you feel about where you are. As you get in touch with the truth of where you are mentally and emotionally you will likely start to feel present for the very first time. What we call ânegativeâ emotions that occur regularly is the indicator of being in the gap. Itâs inherently a negative focus. Depending on how entrenched the pattern is, this could turn around slowly or quickly. Consistent application and adjustment beats impatience any day of the week so give yourself grace with this one. Hereâs how to turn that around. 3 PracticesWhen I say hereâs how to turn that around I am not saying youâll never experience a negative emotion ever again. I truly believe that knowing how to get back to center is infinitely more useful than trying to figure out how to stay there. These 3 practices have proven to be incredibly supportive for me as well as those I coach. (1) Know your shadowIf youâre unfamiliar with shadow work, the concept is simple. Shadow work is⌠Working with your unconscious mind to uncover the parts of yourself that you repress and hide from yourself.3 How do you know you can benefit from shadow work?
Used strategically shadow work is an effective means to shift how you see a situation. It may bring more compassion, understanding, or even healing. If your shadow is keeping you in the gap then itâs really good to know that. My shadow in business is seeking novelty. Most people see me as an extraordinary person when it comes to discipline and structure. The truth is I need that or Iâll want to start 700 projects. Iâm disciplined not because I am by nature but because it keeps me in check. And I know the cost of letting my need for novelty get in the way. Understanding and integrating your shadow will help you see with clear sight. Hereâs a simple exercise to start the practice. Grab your journal and answer the following questions: Who is another coach, healer, or content creator that triggers you? A friend of mine and fellow coach has a great workshop on shadow work thatâs super accessible if you want to take this further. (2) Measure backwardsOne of the most useful practices Iâve personally deployed and my clients have also found incredibly useful is measuring backward. I begin ever client session with an exercise to measure progress and celebrate wins. Itâs crazy how forward-focused we are by default. Many times that comes at the expense of how far weâve come. And itâs not just about celebrating your wins. Measuring backward also answers these questions:
If the answer to any of these questions is no you can adjust. But you donât know the answer if you never look back. Most coaches are just flying by the seat of their pants instead of pacing projects and getting great work out the door. Most are just pushing for the next sale. This is reactionary. Look at your wins from the day is a great place to start. The easiest way to do this is to grab a journal thatâs already formatted for daily tracking. My favorite is The Five Minute Journal (in yellow :)â At the end of each day as a nightly routine, simply record your top 3 wins in the section titled âHighlights of the dayâ in the journal. (3) Track dailyThis keeps you honest with what got done and what didnât Looking at the gap and using that to judge ourselves could be the only thing that is preventing you from getting where you want to go. It could be a measure of unrealistic expectations and less about facts. A simple shift in perspective and developing the habit could be the difference between you continuing to get the same results youâve always got and hitting your goals. What are your commitments? Have you told yourself that youâre going to
But you rarely follow through and instead of refining your system you just fold? You canât blame yourself if you donât have a predictable way to track this. To try and achieve all of this by holding the information in your head and when it doesnât happen letting weeks go by is killing your confidence. Have a dashboard that you can either physically tick off like a paper habit tracker or a dashboard in Notion, ClickUp, or Asana that keeps you on track. If you donât know how to use any of those systems then use Google Sheets. The system you use isnât important. Doing the daily actions is. So find something that works for you and do it. If you want to take Notion for a spin, thatâs my preferred platform. âNotionway has some great free templates for habit tracking and social media planning and their Instagram has a ton of great content. Start there. Without a plan that adds up, youâre not actually setting a goal. Youâre just hoping. You donât lose momentum because you stop moving forward. You stop moving forward because your focus is off. Practicing these regularly will bring you closer to your goals and help you do the one thing most donât take the time to do⌠Gather facts Especially my spiritually minded folk who do everything based on feeling as opposed to hard data. This one is for you. Measure your success. Simply feeling good or feeling as if youâre on the right track isnât the best metric. Especially if you have unexamined parts of yourself that operate in the shadows. Which most of us do. If you love this newsletter, consider sharing it with a friend. It would mean a lot. Until next time, â
â â â â â |
113 Cherry St #92768 , Seattle, WA 98104-2205 |
Mindset and Marketing for Coaches and Creators đ Offer Creation đŁď¸ Messaging đ Marketing đ§ Mindset and Productivity
Jeff Agostinelli April 27, 2024 Read time: 8 minutes Read the online version here Understanding What Drives Action and Practicing Moments of Pause Most of us are conditioned to constantly be doing something. To hurry up and get out the door. To âstop messing aroundâ and get something done. To not waste time doing something unproductive or that doesnât bear fruit. Most of who we are and what weâre led to believe is useful is conditioned behavior. A bundle of neurons reacting to stimulus. And...
Jeff Agostinelli April 13, 2024 Read time: 10 minutes Read the online version here How to Stand Out In Your Niche Without Needing to Compete There are a ton of business coaches out there. Same with Menâs coaches Trauma-informed practitioners Personal coaches And every other niche and moniker known to man. More people get hung up on these things than anything else⌠What do I put in my bio?What do I call myself?Whatâs my niche statement? (I help x do y so they can z) These are definitely...
Jeff Agostinelli March 30, 2024 Read time: 5 minutes Read the online version here The Simple Key to Effortless Content Creation Needing to create content carries a significant weight. A lot goes into coming up with new ideas, planning posts and videos, and finding the time to shoot videos or write posts. Not to mention all the internal chatter... Does this make sense? Are people going to like it? Is this going to make me look stupid? After years of content creation, I've had to find ways to...